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This week's must-have purchase - corduroy and baked beans

No I'm not actually talking about corduroy trousers, a plastic mac or a midi-length floral dress - though get those anyway, they're all great, and this may be your last chance.

I'm talking about a nuclear bunker, and some tins of baked beans and spam – do they still make spam – and perhaps a throw and some fluffy scatter cushions to make it more like home.
Because we're going down people, we're going down.

Actually I don't think that. There has been talk of nuclear war for decades and so far so good, we haven't experienced it yet. However, there is an argument we have never been quite so close to the brink. Our world is currently being run by morons and morons with power is never a good thing.

We have all seen pictures of Kim Jong Un grinning as he goes to press the button of his nuclear missile and that was bad enough. Now we have Donald Trump wading in with threats to completely destroy North Korea should they show any signs of going through with a nuclear attack.

But not only this, Trump decides this would be an appropriate time to pull a cheeky little nickname out of the bag for the North Korean leader. And he goes and chooses Rocket Man after the Elton John song.

Firstly, this suggests Trump has absolutely no idea how serious this threat of nuclear attack could be and if he does, he doesn't know how to appropriately act on it. His actions are a red rag to a bull.

Google references to Trump's Rocket Man comment and, scarily, what comes up is article after article from the American press praising the nickname, calling it a stroke of marketing genius. It is snappy, memorable and everyone knows the Elton John song, they say.

Well I suggest said people, in fact, all people, go and listen to that song and they will find the lyrics far removed from a mindless destruction of the human race.

It is a bitter sweet song about an astronaut leaving his wife and children behind to go into space. It is a song about family, about love, about sense of self and the common emotions that bind us all. It is not about destroying all that at the push of a button.

So dig out your Elton John CDs and play Rocket Man loud and proud. Sing along in your new corduroy trousers, clank your baked bean tins together, but do it. Just do it. Because we're taking Rocket Man back.


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